urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23 "Speech was given to conceal thought.” Jason Wood 2007-12-18T07:46:33Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:5373 2007-12-18T07:46:33Z 2007-12-18T07:46:33Z Well, todays been quite the day.<br /><br />I went shopping with Amanda today. It was fun. I think I may have begun to prove to her that I'm serious this time and that I do want to make things right. She actually kissed me again. It felt right as it should.<br /><br /><br />I'm happier than Ive been in a couple of weeks.<br /><br />hehehe<br /><br />TWL,ATWL&lt;3 urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:5028 2007-12-15T05:31:39Z 2007-12-15T05:31:39Z I fucked up again. Sometimes I shock myself at how stupid I can be. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:4720 2007-12-13T18:39:44Z 2007-12-13T18:39:44Z Obadiah Parker Why are people actively trying to avoid me?<br /><br />My own roommate won't even freaking speak to me. (but that's a different story)<br /><br />Am I really that bad of a human being? That I am to exiled out of existence?<br /><br />Why not burn me at the stake with all of their sins, so that they may be cleansed and pure and rid of blemishes in their lives.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />That's all I am. A blemish in someones skin. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:4306 2007-12-09T15:17:37Z 2007-12-09T19:51:20Z Brett Dennen- Darlin' Do Not Fear "I slept, and I woke up. I think its gonna be a good day."<br /><br />Thats what I said to myself as I jumped up out of bed to realize I'm late for work. Do not fear though, for I am here. Everything seems to be fine so yes, todays gonna be a good day.<br /><br />Thanks to a special someone in my life I believe I'm closer to finding closure in this ordeal. Even if I'm not as close as I was, then I still wouldn't care. At least I've gotten over it enough to be able to sleep.<br /><br />Well I have to make cake batter ice cream. I personally don't feel like being here, but I need the money and everyone else needs a break. TWL,ATWL&lt;3 urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:4063 2007-12-09T07:14:58Z 2007-12-09T07:14:58Z "I know it sounds lame and cliche', but time heals all wounds."<br /><br />It's true. I'm slowly pulling through this. Everyday it gets a little easier but then again its still just as hard if it had just happened. I just need someone here with me. its seems like I'm dependent but I don't care. I can't function or sleep when I'm not with someone. Right now I have no one. I mean I have my friends but I always have them. Thank you. You know who you are. I love you. But I have "no one". and its noyt ;like I can just find someone and just move on, but its not that easy for me. I personally believe I'm not that good looking or cute or "hott" or anything. I'm just normal. PLus to add to it, apparently, "the only girls that think I'm cute, are the ones with boyfriends."<br /><br />I don't know. I can't stop listening to this song, and its calming me a bit. Its a good song. He's a good singer. I like his style. I need to "step outside" for a sec. I'll post sometime tomorrow.<br /><br />&lt;3<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Brett Dennen – Ain’t No Reason<br /><br />There ain’t no reason things are this way<br />It's how they always been and they intend to stay<br />I can't explain why we live this way, <br />We do it everyday.<br /><br />Preachers on the podium speaking of saints<br />Prophets on the sidewalk begging for change<br />Old ladies laughing from the fire escape, cursing my name<br />I got a basket full of lemons and they all taste the same<br />A window and a pigeon with a broken wing<br />You can spend you whole life working for something, <br />Just to have it taken away<br />People walk around pushing back their debts<br />Wearing pay checks like necklaces and bracelets<br />Talking 'bout nothing, not thinking 'bout death<br />Every little heartbeat, every little breath<br />People walk a tight rope on a razor’s edge<br />Carrying their hurt and hatred and weapons<br />It could be a bomb, or a bullet, or a pen<br />Or a thought, or a word, or a sentence<br /><br />There ain't no reason things are this way<br />It's how they always been and they intend to stay<br />I don’t know why I say the things that I say,<br />But I say them anyway<br /><br />But love will come set me free<br />Love will come set me free, I do believe<br />Love will come set me free, I know it will<br />Love will come set my free, yes.<br /><br />Prison walls still standing tall<br />Some things never change at all<br />Keep on building prisons, gonna fill them all<br />Keep building bombs, gonna drop them all<br />Working young fingers bare to the bone<br />Breaking your back, make you sell your soul<br />Like a lung is filled with coal, suffocating slow<br />The wind blows wild and I may move<br />But politicians lie and I am not fooled<br />You don't need no reason or a three piece suit, to argue the truth<br />The air on my skin and the world under my toes<br />Slavery is stitched into the fabric of my clothes<br />Chaos and commotion wherever I go<br />Love, I try to follow<br /><br />Love will come set me free<br />Love will come set me free, I do believe<br />Love will come set me free, I know it will<br />Love will come set my free, yes.<br /><br />There ain't no reason things are this way<br />It's how they always been and they intend to stay<br />I can't explain why we live this way,<br />We do it everyday. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:3714 2007-12-07T09:08:59Z 2007-12-07T09:08:59Z I'm slowly dying. I've come to realize that without an essential thing in my life, that I can no longer exist. I am slowly ceasing to exist in this fragile world filled with fragile hearts.<br /><br />I'm slowly slipping back into my depression. This isn't good and the worst part is, I can't stop. I'm all alone and I need help but no one can help me. Only I can help myself, and I'm not strong enough.<br /><br /><br />I'm not strong enough at all......... urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:3461 2006-12-07T05:43:39Z 2006-12-07T05:43:39Z What makes me tick like so? Why do I flare when angry? Why angry at all? I've never been happier yet I feel so evil inside. Its like something is lurking inside me wanting to get out. What should I do? How do I stop it? I am scared under these sheets alone and yet I wish not to bother anyone else with my worries. The pondering shall continue. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:3214 2006-11-13T04:58:31Z 2006-11-13T04:58:31Z I am a Dumbass. End of story. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:2942 2006-10-28T05:47:42Z 2006-10-28T05:47:42Z I fell down at work today. Like I was sliding along the floor and I hit a dry spot and I fell. It was embarassing. Cause Amanda was laughing for awhile. But at least she was happy. End of story. <br />*starts new story*<br /><br />I love Amanda. She has literally made me the happiest guy on the face of the Earth. and thats no exaggeration. &lt;3333333333 :D urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:2711 2006-10-24T05:08:48Z 2006-10-24T05:08:48Z So its been 1 one week as of today. Ive never been happier. and Im not even kidding.&lt;3 urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:2531 2006-10-21T19:34:11Z 2006-10-21T19:34:11Z Thuggish Ruggish Bone - Bone Thugs and Harmony(dont ask) So last night me and Amanda went to the Springstead Homecoming Game. It was really weird being back there again. But oh well. I got to see a whole bunch of old friends. It was fun. so back to Amanda. This girl is amazing. She makes me so freaking happy is ridiculous. Yeah. I know. You're jealous. and you should be. :D urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:2206 2006-10-17T06:08:31Z 2006-10-17T06:08:31Z Anyway you want it - Journey she said yes. Thats basically it. :D urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:1806 2006-10-15T15:49:09Z 2006-10-15T15:49:09Z Control - Mute Math Ok. So now my manager knows whats going on. Its not good. Cause now she'll never let me live it down. Yeah so apparently I was making it really obvious. And to add to it. I made a huge fool out of myself yesterday right in front of her. I went to pick a fudge bottle up and throw it behind my back. When I went to do it though, I let go to early. The fudge didnt go into the air, It went in a straight beeline to the backroom door(which was open). She just looks at me and starts laughing uncontrollably. I was soo freaking embarassed. So thats my story tonight. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:1722 2006-10-13T18:03:12Z 2006-10-13T18:03:12Z Break the Same - MUTEMATH ok so today has been a busy day so far. I woke up today to buy my NBT6 tickets to find out that I didnt have enough money to buy them. So I had to run to the bank and deposit 100 bucks. While there I saw Tally-uh and e talked for like a kabillion nanoseconds(roughly around 5 minutes). Afterward I went home and bought 3 tickets. Then I just check the mail. and guess what.<br /><br />MUTEMATH!!!!!!!! yep. My cd finally came in. Its really god. a lot better than I expected it to be. Im really happy. all I have left to do today is go to work at 4 and to figure out what concerts I have planned for the next month. :D urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:1310 2006-10-13T05:04:43Z 2006-10-13T05:04:43Z The Futere Freaks Me Out - Motion City Soundtrack is that I love you.<br /><br /><br />“Look wise, say nothing, and grunt. Speech was given to conceal thought.” urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:1132 2006-10-12T21:38:44Z 2006-10-12T21:38:44Z Head over Heels- Tears for Fears I'm supposed to be in my Macro Econ class right now. I decided not to go. *Gasp* Jason is skipping? Yes. Me and little red riding hood are skipping through the forest on our way to gma's house.lol. Nah. I just didnt feel like it. End of Story. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:990 2006-10-11T21:22:30Z 2006-10-11T21:22:30Z Ok. So I just got yelled at by my sister because I said two words. Lip. Ring.<br />Yes. Its true. I am getting a lip ring soon. I dont know when, but I will be getting one soon. I just have to mainly wait until I move out of my house. But yeah. I was just wondering what everyone thinks about it. I know that I may pay for it in the long run, but I want to do something new with myself other than cutting my hair. I believe this will be a great experience for me and I am going to do it whether or not my family likes it. I'll have a picture of it on my myspace in some short time. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:688 2006-10-11T06:31:55Z 2006-10-11T06:31:55Z Noticed - Mute Math Well alot has been going on in my life in the past weeks. To anyone who reads this, I welcome you to my mindful toughts and senseless rabble. Most of this stuff will either be me explaining whats gouing on with me or as what you people would classify as emoness. I hope I will actually take the time to make this useful. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:gametester23:509 2006-10-11T05:58:36Z 2006-10-11T05:58:36Z So theres this girl. I've known this girl for roughly around 3 months now. This girl is gorgeous in my eyes. I want to tell her. But I can't. Certain things keep me from doing so. I'm torn between a lust of something and a respect for someone. I can't get her out of my head. The more this drags on, the worse it gets. Everytime I see her, I feel a pain inside. Yet at the same time, A warmth fill my soul and soothes the pain. Seeing her smile makes me feel like a child at a fair. I don't even know if she even knows I exist when it comes to this type of situation. I mean I can talk to her, but when I look her in her eyes, I melt like butter. Oh the agony, oh the torment. Why must you haunt me so? The letters of thine name are strewn across the midnight sky in the brightest of lights. Oh how I wish I could make you mine...